BB Webb as BB Webb!

Exploring the Possibilities

We Americans…. October 31, 2009

What is happening?

I watched, just this morning, Michael Moore’s film, ‘Sicko’ (from 2007), while just earlier reading Brian Patrick Cork’s Saturday blog about the recent credit card travesty and diabolical ‘adjustment’ meant to further cripple and keep Americans hostage.

flag6_5th_st_nw-300x202Having just reviewed the increase in healthcare costs for me and my employees and having in the same week received this year’s land taxes and increased costs from a variety of service providers, (while balancing internal work having part of my team out sick), all the while working tirelessly to build and grow my company, to make good decisions, spend my money well to increase revenue, quality and service, I am supremely and outrageously, disappointed. I work daily to balance my growing employer costs and to make good decisions which serve my business, my employees, my clients, my community and myself.

For the folks without a ‘fight’ gene, or an ability to strategize their own positive growth around this miasm of self serving change and dour conditions in America, (I’m talking culture and perspective), it all looks sadly hopeless, this coming from a Polly Anna of positivity. I’m pissed.

And wait til I soon share some incredulous happenings within my own community.

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My risks are a part of who I am, my personality. I’m an artist and I’m an entrepreneur. Though, as I visit with all sorts of folks throughout my busy weeks, people wanting a quality of life, simple, reasonable, I am most saddened. They fall back into fear which is paralysing. How to take care of a sick child, pay their mortgage, afford a few days away from work. I find myself quietly fuming in my safe home, considering what action the government or my bank might pull as I diligently pay my monthly mortgage.

No matter what our differences, we ultimately rise or fall together. How do we take care of one another, despite our differences? Why can’t we learn from other cultures, France, England, Mexico, models of healthcare which actually CARE for people, promote wellness. How might we blend the ideals of democracy in a framework that allows us achievers and risk takers to rally while creating a system which supports those weaker to do their best, to guide, educate and enable others to thrive within what is possible for them. How do we enable others to do better for themselves. I want to be part of that trolley car initiative.

s2Why the greed, intolerance, judgment? What IS THE PROBLEM? How did our culture in particular become so self centered, greedy? Insurance companies, drug companies, how is it that daycare, banks and school systems have become so entirely ‘schewed’….I can’t find the right word. I feel on the periphery of many of these issues as I focus my energies elsewhere, my ability to keep up with all the change limited as I endeavor to work toward my own passions. How much time do we have as Americans to multitask and seek out answers to all the issues impacting us as we raise families, build our businesses, contribute to causes which matter to us?

Just as our greatest wars are fought within ourselves, so too are the greatest wars for our country within our very own borders.

I am working on an initiative within my very own Carl House business to champion the cause of other service providers in my industry, including facilities like mine. There is enough business for us all. Their success is my success. I am not lessened by their good work or ideas but rather encouraged, inspired to do better.

How might we all become part of fearless solutions instead of limited reasoning on how things can’t or won’t work. I work on the same thinking with my team at Carl House. ‘Bring me a better idea. Share how we might help one another do better, serve our customers better.’ It’s a mindset and a choice.

I’m embarrassed by areas within our government, not just nationally, limited thinkers, greedy marauders within my own community, leading people by selfish means.

This diatribe issued forth on Halloween, a scarier day than I ever imagined. We need a new day in America.

BB Webb

 

Simple perhaps……though… October 29, 2009

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Sufi Dancers

We don’t know what we don’t know….until we know it.

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And at that point, where the sky hits the sea, or the idea becomes form or the mosquito hits the glass, we are but awash in the ever unfolding process of becoming.

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And on and on and on it goes.

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Might we be on occasion privy to the loveliness (really) of the dance.

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BB Webb

 

If it truly IS darkest before the dawn…. October 27, 2009

Filed under: Humor — BB Webb @ 9:22 pm
Tags: , , , ,

….Some levity is needed.

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Let’s all just take a collective deep breath, count to 3, (I’ll count to 13), imagine where you want to be and trust a little…and then a little more. Wait….wait….wait…… ‘Boo’!…..there or better in a flash.

Darkest before the dawn….hmmmmmm…. What’s the WORST that could happen??? Better YET, what’s the BEST thing that could happen?? I’m going there.

BB Webb

 

Are you a ‘Stuffer’??? October 26, 2009

Filed under: Reflection — BB Webb @ 8:09 pm
Tags: , , , ,

Are you? Do you ‘stuff’ down what you’re feeling….hold your tongue, distract yourself with ‘happy thoughts’ or pout away because you just couldn’t express what you were feeling? Do you tend to blame the other guy, refuse to take ‘ownership’ for what occurs in your life, focus on that glass that is clearly half empty in your eyes. Do you eat to cover your pain or choose other distractors like alcohol, drugs, excessive work or who knows what else.

I seem to be on a pensive trail just now…stay with me if you can…it’s no doubt leading somewhere; for me it is and possibly stirring up some thought for you. (Perhaps you need to play the soundtrack below to get you in the mood and frame of mind for this particular post)!

The_Thinker_Rodin-2-713279I’m just wondering. As I watch my own life and patterns, similar to a movie trailer, one scene building up to the next, the players, the background scenery, how my face changes, my hairstyles, the clothes I wear and for me, thankfully the animals and few people who act as angels and well, all the folks with whom I come in contact are teachers on my path.

I watch how my time has been spent over the years, the passions and furies, the tender and angry moments, the delusions that have accompanied my life lessons leading to the epiphanies, disappointments, breakthroughs. I’m looking at the choices I’ve made and the ones I’m considering.

I see too where I have and have not played it ‘safe’. I see how ‘outloud’ my journey has been and I’m wondering how you, how others view their lives so far and really how conscious your choices or mine have been.

Many days feel like a cloud of habitual tendencies, a drive and relentlessness because, because to ME, with regard to relentlessness, there is no option. I’ve a small circle of allies in this arena, only a few who understand that gene or certainly who might hold a space for the enormity of that drive. It just is.

I’m curious what you feel about YOUR options. How did my mother or your mother see the choices in her life? Where was she intent on ‘arriving’ in her life? What were her strengths, the possibilities she saw?

I’m just wondering as I consider my weeks and months ahead, what moves are best for the next scene of my play.

Maybe we’re all made of the same old stuff. I’m wondering.

I like finding the truth, for me….this truth and the next. And perhaps it’s similar to yours….or not.

I’ll send this song out to a special friend…perhaps the right people DO show up just when you need them, and maybe when they need you.

I continue to trust the magic.

BB Webb

 

The choices we make… October 25, 2009

Everyday we have an opportunity. I’m thinking of my two friends. I’m thinking of my friend with cancer and I’m thinking of my friend who feels she is at the end of her rope.

My few best friends are facing challenging situations in their lives. As I sit with them, and as I send them my very best thoughts and energy, I know I am doing good.

Moreover, they are doing ‘good’…and they are doing well. I watch the battles within themselves and how they move through them. They are brave women, different as can be yet there is a cord of similarity which runs through us.

imagesI had a discussion with a friend about the words warrior vs soldier. I prefer warrior as soldier, in the definitions I’ve found, soldier seems to lean more toward military service and, to me, I hold images of warrior in a different way. (Words perplex me…their scope and diversity and how personal they are to each of us).

war⋅ri⋅or  [wawr-ee-er, wawr-yer, wor-ee-er, wor-yer] Show IPA –noun
1. one who is engaged in or experienced in battle.
2. one who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity, cause, or conflict: neighborhood warriors fighting against developers.
3. a person who shows or has shown great vigor, courage, or aggressiveness, as in politics or athletics.
4. a person engaged or experienced in warfare; soldier.

images-1Yes, my friend’s battles are within themselves. They are not part of a fire brigade or a rescue brigade, they are fighting, leaning toward more a self actualization.

And then I remembered…while stumbling through some websites on brainwave technology…reiterating what I believe with the law of attraction.

‘Everything you are is the result of what you have thought. Our attitudes, beliefs, and thoughts attract related positive and negative physical/mental manifestations and experiences. In other words, you get what you think most about, whether you want these experiences/manifestations or not. This concept has been prevalent among many philosophers and spiritual advocates for thousands of years.

So, what do you think most about everyday? Does anger, worry, fear, anxiety, depression, aggression, instability, paranoia, irritability, or moodiness lead your mental/emotional state and thoughts? If so, then experiences validating these thoughts are exactly what you will continue attracting into your life.

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I am watching my friends move into their aliveness in new ways as they wipe away what doesn’t work, as they move BEYOND their anger, their doubt and cynicism. Out of their cocoons, through the hardships, disappointments, naive expectations, someone new is emerging, their bodies are changing, their faces indeed are softer and there is less rigidity in their walk. I love experiencing the change and am eager to see what might next manifest in their lives.

They have made new choices and it’s working for them. I am inspired and will remember this when I return again myself to the places which serve me not.

The possibilities on where we might fly are endless.

BB Webb

 

At the end of her rope… October 23, 2009

I’m wondering….what does one do when they feel at the end of their rope?

I’m thinking of someone I am very, very close to….I’ve known her all my life. She’s a most complex, emotional and passionate person. When she’s scared, feels misunderstood, is lost in hopelessness or cornered, she gets angry, an anger that certainly no man has been able to tame or sit with. I however can. I’ve known her for years and her fury, when tapped, is unmatched. It boils sometimes for months even years, but when that geyser is ready to blow, stand back. Only later do her endless tears and sobs bring a refuge. When channeled creatively, she can set the world on fire. Though tonight she was both angry and something else which I’d not seen before. Frankly, it was a little scary.

images-1She asked me some things this evening. She’s typically a very bright and positive person but tonight, she was filled with disdain, dark, anger covering a helpless sadness. I could see she felt terribly, inexorably alone. I felt it in her hollow eyes. With big movements and gestures, a furrow on her brow, ‘What happens,’ she asked me, her voice high pitched yet commanding, ‘when your options seem out. When your money WON’T stretch any more, when the risks are beginning to outweigh sense, your ability to swing with what’s coming at you in terms of not just resources but possibly your sense of self, your flexibility is challenged and you feel at the end of that rag tag filament’?

‘I’m clearly being tested as every day there are not one, but three challenges which a year ago would have made me completely crumble.’ She sat down for a moment, in thought, her head down, ‘I have you’ a slight smile, ‘but’, (and she meant no offense), ‘I need something more.’ She stood again, began moving about, ‘I feel too exposed, too vulnerable’, she stated, ‘I have holes of exposure that I can’t control and they’re beginning to significantly wear me down.’ At that moment, she looked entirely dejected, very unlike herself. ‘People and my safe zones are disappearing. I need to rely on JUST me more. My money just won’t service my obligations any longer. Taxes are due, bills are mounting, I’ve taken on perhaps more than I can handle and the cost of everything feels as though it is cascading out of control. I need to get smarter, more independent, self sufficient, faster. I’ve lost my healthy perspective BB’.

She then sat down next to me and looked me dead in the eyes, as though I were a mirror, her face so drawn and terribly, relentlessly sad. She looked older. I did not know her.

She said calmly, ‘I’m at the end of my rope’.

As her friend I just sat with her, unsure what to do myself except breathe.

As we listened to the huge silence between us, my thoughts of how to help gone, my encouraging bits of wisdom vanished like a mist and I too then, felt at the end of mine.

BB Webb

 

The Road Not Taken… October 22, 2009

ForestTonight….I Am Considering the Road, for me, Not Yet Taken…

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveller, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

…Robert Frost